Long time no blog

Hey, I haven't got much to write even though I haven't written in ages. I have so much homework. I literally have never had this much at one time. I'm so stressed. Also, the musical. I have no time. I wake up go to school, go to rehearsal, do homework, sleep, wake up, go to school, rehearsal, homework...etc. I'm so tired. I have to write and memorize 2 5-6 minute speeches, write 2 essays, read 3 essays and do 2 worksheets for each, study for a world issues test, draw 4 symmetrical bugs, memorize a monologue, do a family living assignment and practice my dances for the musical. I'm dieing. We danced for like 8 hours yesterday. I can barely walk. I wouldn't give it up for the world but it's so stressful. I have to go write a speech... :( bye.

stolen wallet

My wallet got stolen. It had $50, my medicare, my student id cards, my hbc rewards, my ae card, an ae gift card, my library card, my reciepts, some change, some phone numbers, my snorlax pokemon card:(, a note from ashley from grade 9, and a note from my old crush. I'm sad.

I'm seventeen.

It's my birthday. I'm seventeen. Not much else to say. I'm going to get a manicure with my cousin later then coming home for supper then going to the movies. I want to practice my cat makeup soon. I got facepaint. That is all.

Untitled

My wisdom teeth are being a bitch. My mom is ignoring me. I need facepaint. I am pissed.

I am just chillin' here at my Granny's house on her laptop while everyone else is sleeping. It's my birthday tomorrow. My aunt Julia bought me makeup as a gift. It's really nice and works really well. I had agreat time with her at the mall and I love being with her. I hope I see her a couple more times before I leave. Steven(my cousin) is the funniest kid EVER. I love him tons.

We had a turkey last night for supper. My Granny is moving so she is trying to get rid of food. I have gained like 10 pounds since I got here which sucks because I need to lose weight for Cats. I didn't watch the superbowl yesterday which is weird. I just couldn't watch it. I don't really like either team particularly and my taste for football is fading away. Also, there was not much enthusiasm about it like there usually is, my dad din't even yell or break anything and the team he was rooting for lost. I watched curling for about an hour yesterday

I am going shopping tomorrow with my Granny for my birthday gift. I want shoes I think. I also need to get to the dollar store to buy facepaint so I can practise for Cats. I'm excited to get going. I need to start writing my speech today. But, I don't know if I can because, A) I have a feeling I'll be busy, B) I think I have to get it approved by the teacher and C) I have no clue what to do it about.

I've been continuing to think about Europe. I discussed it with my friend Kirsten and she might be coming. Which is like super exciting. I'll write more when I know more.

I talked to my parents about a tattoo. My mom says, I need to think about it for about a week longer, she needs to approve of the tattoo and it might be my birthday gift. It depends on if she agrees with the tattoo design. She didn't like my ideas and wants me to get like a colorful flower or a ladybug. Yuck. It's been on my life goals list to get a tattoo for so long.

I am really bored right now. I am watching the family channel waiting for my Granny to get off the phone so I can call Ashley.

Until next time,Ciao.
Jennifer

I'm gonna live in London and get a tattoo and you can't stop me.

I want to travel the world and I also want to get a tattoo. I have plans for both. You'll see, they'll happen.
I want a tattoo that either says, "No Day But Today", or "to thine own self be true"...I'm leaning towards "No Day But Today" but I dunno if it's over done. I feel like someone else I know has it but I'm not sure. Well I'm sure I'll figure it out.
I think I am going to London for 6 months after highschool. Just gonna save some money, pack a bag and get on the plane. I need a workers permit I think but I can do that...NBD. They are hard to get in the UK right now but once again, I'll figure it out. I want to travel the world before I go to University because It's a great time to do it. Once I get into university I am in it for 5 years and then I want to teach right away. I think I'll teach in like Greece or something but I'm not sure. I just know I want to live in Italy, England, Spain, France(maybe), Greece, and NYC also I want to visit Germany, and possibly Eygpt or Ireland. I want to see the world!!!
I saw a Mel Gibson movie tonight with my Aunt Julia and my cousins Christopher and Steven. I love Julia. She lights up the room when she walks in and whatever emotion she feels it spreads. Like when she smiles her eyes go all squinty and her nose wrinkles up and it makes you feel so happy and when she is sad you can not help but cry. I love her. She is one of my favorite relatives and she gives the best advice ever.

Until next time, Ciao.
Jennifer the world traveller

On the train.

I'm on the train. It's about 6:15. We are moving. It's exciting. I'm hella hungry. People aren't being very friendly but oh well. The person across from me has gel nails. They are nice but they don't suit her. No one is sitting beside me. Thank God. A lady just gave me a blanket. It feels weird. It's kind of bumpy.


There's something magical about it, the soothing, bouncy, rocking rhythm. The power lines look like jellyfish stingers stretched out. Wiggling. I'm seeing things I never would have seen if I hadn't come.


The horn just blew five times. The sky is yellow, orange, pink, and light blue. The mountains in the distance and clouds are all the same navy blue. It looks like a painting. If I pay attention to the sounds, I hear the rocks bouncing off the bottom of the train, the creaking leather shoes of the old man across and behind, the wind and someone flipping through a magazine.


The horn just blew four times. There are thousands of trees. The snow looks blue with the sky reflecting against it. The person across from me is talking. I like her. She doesn't talk much, just enough and she is quiet and sweet. I wonder about her life, she seems like she is trying to escape.


The horn just blew three times. The black lady in front of me is beautiful. She seems to be an alcoholic but I don't mind. She constantly drinks beer. I don't mind. She is pleasant. She smokes, which makes her voice crackle and you can hear flem coming up as she converses. I don't mind though because she is beautiful to make up for it. I heard her talking about getting drunk, money and her boyfriend. She likes action movies and is going on a diet when she gets 'home'.


Everyone has their window shades closed or nearly closed. I left mine open so I could stay up all night and watch the sky change. It's inspiring. The moon is still out. It looks like a half of a rubber bouncy ball.


The lady behind me looks to me like a university student. She is quite studious. She has a laptop with her as well as books, notepads, pens and strange food. She is eating something like hummus I think. I have wanted to talk to her ever since I got on the train but I'm too nervous.


The old man across and behind me is wearing beige slacks, creaky leather shoes, a plaid shirt, a grey jacket and has the most beautiful white leather bag with golden brown detailing. He has faded tattoos on his hands. This is a tattoo he had on his hand. I don't know what it is.




He is taking a few different types of pills right now. Earlier I saw him drink a greyish- brown thick liquid from a 2L sprite bottle. I wonder is it was polyjuice potion...? I asked him for the time a while ago. He had a lovely, raspy voice.



The lady in front of me and to the left is elderly. She is knitting. It's very sweet looking. I don't know what it is supposed to be but the yarn is a thin, silky, light blue color. I wish I brought some knitting.



The sky is getting pinker. I got about three hours of sleep last night. It's a 15 hour train ride.

The lady across from me said that if I went to the canteen she would give me money to get her a water. I'm not hungry now but I may get something later. The train just whistled three times. The sky is really pink.



The train is stopping. Is this my stop? This doesn't look like St. Lambert. There is a huge field with a tree all by itself. I like it. The sky is pink, yellow, orange and blue and the clouds are purple and pink and some are yellow. It's spectacular.



The horn just blew six times. My wisdom teeth are coming in and it hurts like a bitch. For a 10 day trip all I packed was a small book bag and my purse and I met a lady at the train station in Moncton who was going away for three days and had a suitcase and big bag. I laughed.



There is this old lady on the train who I've decided to call Old Yeller. She is the loudest person I've ever heard. I barely slept because of her. She is really quite funny though. She went and smoked with some young adults, played poker( almost played strip poker until advised against it), and told the best stories. She can't read or write and she has a son who is 47 years old and has never drank or smoked before. I like her for being ignorant and accidentally funny.



We are almost in Montreal. YAY! Old Yeller is saying how jobs are hard to find. I could not agree more. The sun is out fully now and it's insanely bright. This is a fun train ride.



The black lady offered me candy. I said no but I wish I said yes. Soon I'll be in St. Lambert. I'm hungry again. The sun is so fantastic. It's always a perfect circle, unlike the moon. I like the moon though.



I just smiled at the black lady so I could see her smile. Wow, she is stunning.

When I was little I used to think the train was huge but it feels so small now.



Oh, I have a funny story, Last night I was peeing in one of the train bathrooms and this teenage girl walks in on me. I was embarrassed but it was friggin' hilarious.



We are on a bridge. This feels like Quebec. There are mountains full of trees to my left. There are so many trees it looks like fur. It looks like a lumpy, furry cat. I'm bored. There is a man with a guitar sitting beside the black woman now. He played his guitar last night.There was an announcement, "Live entertainment, guitar on the sky deck". I didn't go. the girl across from me is doing crossword puzzles. She did them for at least eight hours.



I love the train. I get to take it back to Moncton on the 12th. I'm gonna bring more food next time. My stop is in two minutes.



I was in such a rush to get off the train and see my mom I forgot to say goodbye to the black lady, the lady across from me, the guitar man, the creaky shoed old man, the old woman and Old Yeller. Oh well. I'm sure they will understand.


Until next time, Ciao.
Sillabub

Sillabub and Jemima brownies

I practiced doing cat makeup. I didn't do so well but at least I tried. I'm gonna try again soon. I need more face paint though and a better black eyeliner.
My train to Montreal leaves in five hours and I still have no clue how I'm getting to the train station. I'm excited.
I just made brownies and not to brag or anything but, they are pretty spectacular.
I still don't understand my part in cats. Whatever it is, I'm sure I will enjoy myself.
Until next time, Ciao.
Sillabub

Sillabub visits Montreal

Good news and bad news.
Good news,
I made the musical!! I don't have any idea who my character is...but I made it. I'm Sillabub. I think it's like a different name for Jemima , but Jemima is in it. So maybe they had no parts left to put me in... anyways. I don't care if I have a small part. I'm just glad to be a part of the show and I'm completely shocked. Ashley called and told me and I didn't believe her until I saw the cast list with my own two eyes.
Bad news,
I won't be in school until Monday, the 15th. I am going to Montreal. I am excited about this because I get to see relatives I haven't seen in years, and see my mom who I miss more than words can express. But I'm not going for all joyful reasons.
I'm sad because I will miss the first week and a bit of the new semester resulting in a homework pileup and everyone already has their select friends after a week, also I will miss musical related things, which is a total bummer. I hope they don't kick me off the cast!!!
Oh and I start theatre arts next semester so that's scary.
I take the train at 5:00 tomorrow night and arrive in Montreal at about 8:00 in the morning. It's gonna be a long train ride. Thankfully I have books to read.

Post Script: I've always wanted a stranger name because I feel like my name is too plain. Mr MacGillivray told me in so many words that I was unique enough and didn't need a strange name. The classmates in the immediate area seamed to agree. I always thought I was more of a Layla or Petunia but his theory is nice. If I had a strange name people might expect me to be odd but since my name is common people can be pleasantly or unpleasantly surprised.

Until next time, Ciao.
Sillabub

"I looka like a fool last night!"

It's Friday. My parents and little sisters went away to Montreal. So my sister and I are chillen' without 'em until next Saturday.:)
It's pretty much a blizzard outside so like all the schools are closed. I don't have school anyways so it feels like a waste of a snow day to me. It's exam week and I am done my exams. I had English, Environmental Science, Instrumental Music and Voice. I think I passed all of them but I'm a bit nervous about the English one. I didn't do the math one because I already failed and it would be a waste of 2 hours. My math teacher called and said I could still make it but I would rather sit at home and do nothing.
Hmm...
Oh yes, I slept over at Danica's house on Wednesday night with Ashton and we went to to the voice exam together. It was a good time. We did karaoke(these eyes) , made Nacho Libre videos and took hilarious pictures. I love these people.
The voice exam was to sing in the auditorium, on stage, into a microphone in front of the whole class. It was really scary. I love being on stage but I felt I could have done better. My voice was shaky, my high notes were off key, and I did the trills wrong. Mr. MacGillivray and Mrs. Dominie were there. I would compare MacGillivray to Simon Cowell and Dominie to Paula Abdul. Haha. Oh well, no use dwelling over it. I don't know what I'll do today but hopefully it involves leaving my house and seeing Brittany.

Exams.

It's 11:35. I have two exams tomorrow. I still have a shitload of studying to do. But I'm tired so I'm going to bed. I finished A Streetcar Named Desire and read Nineteen Eighty-four. I didn't like the latter of the two. I found it very well written and the plot was insane and so well thought out but I just didn't like it. Anyway. Goodnight

bye.

Late for school, lacking a book, having to volunteer and on my gosh darn period.

I should be at school right now. It 10:30 am. I don't feel well and I didn't do my homework. But, I want to go. I don't want to miss English class because I love it in a way and I think the teacher is brilliant. I also need a new book to read. I hate not having something to read, I feel like I'm missing something. I kind of want to read A Streetcar Named Desire but I want to see what MacGill has in mind first.
I am singing, and playing piano and clarinet today at the retirement home. I used to go twice a week but I haven't gone in about a month so I need to get back into the habit. I feel strangely nervous. I've gone plenty of times but I still think I'm going to do a bad job every time.
My bangs are being fucking retarded today. I don't know why I mentioned that but I know it's annoying me. I'm taking the city bus to school. It comes at 11:10 I think but I don't know. Well, I better go do my homework and get ready to leave. Also I'm on my period which is annoying and I'm in a pretty pissed off mood. But yeah.

Until next time, Ciao.
Jenn-the-late for-school-whale-breeder

So many fantastic books, so little time.

I just finished a great book. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time. It was fantastic. My English teacher, Mr MacGillivray lent it to me. In the past two and a half weeks I've read, The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time, Lives of Girls and Women, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, The Sun Also Rises, and The Unbearable Lightness of Being. They are all pretty phenomenal. I feel differently towards Harry Potter than the others. My favorite was The Unbearable Lightness of Being which is officially my second favorite book. My first being Hamlet.
I don't particularly feel like writing right now.

Until next time, Ciao.
Jenn

Bad dancing English teacher

Hmm...where to begin.
I have almost officially decided what I want to be. English Teacher. I will need a Bachelor of Arts(English) minor in philosophy I'm thinking I want something drama related as well and Bachelor of Education. A bud of mine, Kirsten wants pretty much the same thing I found out today so I'm pretty excited! I think I'm going to St. Thomas...I'm so excited!!!
What else is new...
Oh yes, I had my audition for the musical today! It was so scary. I nearly fainted. I did a monologue and sang and it was fun but I was really nervous. I hope I did okay. We are most likely doing the musical, Cats, which is one of my all time favorites. I really hope I get a part. There is about 20-25 parts and about 70 people signed up for auditions! Some people didn't show up for their auditions today though. If I could play anyone I would be Rumpleteazer, or Jemima but, I would be happy with anything. I'm really scared I won't get in...ahhhhhh!!! The dance audition's are soon too and I am a TERRIBLE dancer. So...yeah.
Anyways.

Until next time, Ciao.
Jennthewhalebreeder

Broken piano, fight with my mom and audition.

Hello.
I took apart my piano today. It's old and a bunch of keys are stuck together. It's quite annoying. I learned to play a Regina Spektor song, but it's using chords. I pretty much only use chords unless I'm learning a song to sing. The song is called "Raindrops".
I fought with my mom today. She is annoyingly mad at me. I hate when people ignore me, so, this breaks my heart.
I HAVE AN AUDITION TOMORROW! I'm actually so nervous. I feel like I'm not prepared enough. I always do really bad and can't sing and I read the monologue and don't even act at all because I'm so scared. I already have major butterflies in my stomach. The song(Mama who bore me from Spring Awakening) is amazing and extremely difficult for me to sing and I am probably going to ruin it. I still haven't picked a monologue yet. I'm choosing between this comical one about a girl asking her boyfriend if she looks fat or a dramatic one about a fight with a boyfriend. I'm sort of leaning towards the comical one but, I'm not entirely sure. I'm the last person to go tomorrow and I'm auditioning for my two absolute favorite teachers, Mr MacGillivray and Mrs. Dominie. They teach English and Music. I either want to be an English or a Music teacher. Preferably English. Anyways, off topic. I am so scared...

Until next time, Ciao
redeerb elahw eht refinnej

Heaviness

My last two posts were a little heavy so I'll try to be bit less focused on my philosophies on life for now. I just read some other teenage blogs and they are a lot more relaxed and funny and a lot less depressing.
So...
I am really worried about after high school. When I hear the word university, I cringe. I have no idea how I'm going to pay for it. I don't want to get a huge student loan because the interest is insane and I don't want to still be paying it off when I'm 50. My parents aren't paying any of it except books. It cost like $20,000 a year for courses, food and residence. I don't have that kind of money. I have $3000 saved up so far. I will be in university for about 6 years. That's about $120,000 on university. That's a shit load of money. I will have to take a year off before university to work. So...let's say I make $18,000 that year add $2000 from this summer and $2000 from next summer plus $3000 working through next year and the $3000 I have saved. That's $28,000. Then I will work while I am in university. About $3500 during each year and $2500 in the summers. Approximately $56,000 that pays about half. Then add scholarships and if my parents give me any...so I will need like a $55,000 student loan. Holy fuck.
Sorry for going on about this. It's pretty boring. I am so freaked out. That wasn't light. That was heavy. My heart hurts.

until next time, ciao.
Jennifer the very worried whale breeder

Epiphany on the bus

I have that feeling again.
The feeling that I've had an epiphany.
I now realize that no one in the entire world gives a fucking shit about anyone but themselves.
In an average conversation I avoid talking about myself because I know they don't want to hear it. I ask questions about the select person with whom I am conversing with.
They, minus the occasional specialties, respond quite well to the feeling of another person wanting to know about them.
They speak proudly of themselves or seek pity.
No one notices if I'm truly listening or just staring blankly at them.
I insert a yes, no, or a new question when it seems needed.
No one wants to hear about your life unless they, A) feel it involves them, causing them to feel pity, love, hatred et cetera for you B) They relate to said topic or C) They genuinely care(very rare).

Until next time, Ciao.
Lady Jenn the breeder of the whales